One of the things most people do not “get” about why losing a baby is so hard is because they don’t understand that you lost the future you had planned with your child as he or she grew up. They don’t understand that you will most likely yearn for your child at all different phases of life. We all want the too-short lives of our babies to mean something, and following are some ways you can find hope after your devastating loss, whether your loss was recent or long ago. Some of these may seem a bit awkward or unnatural at first, but once you find even a few ways to make your baby an important part of your life, it will soon feel natural. Try not to feel overwhelmed, and don’t feel guilty if you are not ready to do any of these things yet. *Talk about your baby, say your baby’s name. Share his or her story whenever you feel comfortable. *Make something in honor of your baby. Creating a shadow box, crocheting a blanket or planning a memorial garden can be healing and keep your hands busy. *Attend events for bereaved parents. Memorial walks, monument dedications and holiday ceremonies not only bring you in contact with a community of parents missing their baby, but it feels wonderful to have your baby honored in this way by others. *Do things for others in remembrance of your baby. Random Acts of Kindness, donations to items to hospitals and more can bring meaning to his or her life and make you feel good about creating a legacy. *Share stories, photos and mementos with your other children, even those who are born after your loss. *Buy souvenirs or create fun rituals/traditions when you are on family vacations. *Collect something that reminds you of your baby such as butterflies, angels, lady bugs, etc., and display them in your home. *Start a birthday or holiday tradition. *Design a tattoo. Often, grieving parents feel alone and as if their baby doesn’t matter, and an important part of finding hope is finding ways to weave your baby into your family’s story in meaningful ways. Finding hope is crucial to being able to move forward and enjoy life again.